Not Quite Mosquito Free

 

he Bee Hive, City Centre -I am back on track. Although not really full throttle, I am catching up God Willing. I was bedridden for 2 weeks due to Malaria Tapioca a.k.a Dengue Fever.

 

How do I feel? Resurrected. It took me 5 days to realise I had something more than a yoyo fever. Luckily it wasn’t too late. However, recovery would take time in spite of the long gone fever. In English they also call it Bone Breaking Fever, so you can imagine how it feels like to be sick.

I thought I was going to be paralysed. I am trying to familiarize myself with the life I used to lead. Striving to build my mental and physical strength now. I need lots of water, 100 Plus and vitamins. Pray for me and wish me luck, ok.

 

Besides having Aedes to wreck my health, currently I also have another type of mosquito bugging my life. This mosquito is also quite blood sucker. It infects people with its untrue stories. Makes this irritating noise that is destructible of others’ lives.

 

Therefore, I have decided to write A Memo to this mosquito;

 

 

Dear mosquito

 

What do you want from me? I think you should be thankful to God and move on with life. Dwelling and stirring hatred on peoples’ happiness would only make hurt your pride and dignity. Please look into your heart. Purify it. Be thankful to God, please my friend. I have nothing against you but if you try something. I always believe that justice shall prevail someday. 

 

I have no idea to sort out individuals who try so hard and never stop from making up stories and spreading speculations about others. My brain is cracking here. Anyone?

 

P/S: By the way mosquito, I don’t look like you. I have big eyes. Yes, I have some social skills and so do you. But hey, sorry to disappoint you but we are so different. Stop humiliating yourself will you? God Bless

 

Control of Thyself

 

D

’Kayu, City Centre“It is with the control of the self that respect shall be gained.” This is no words of wisdom from Yoda bequeathed upon me but from an elderly person that I admire of her calmness and perseverance.

 

What was her definition of self control? Is it a key to egoism or is it a sign of maturity? How do we balance both in juxtaposition and not go to extremes?

 

Does self control mean being in power? What are the differences between gaining power and letting power from within to flow and reach out the rest? Does power necessarily have to some level equate to evil?

 

I tried to decipher the beauty of being able to be in control of the self. It is beautiful when the essence is Iman….

 

The Past

C

ity Centre – I’ve read once that not letting go of your past would hold you back from moving forward in life. How true this thesis could be proven depends on one’s thought and experience I guess.

I myself would have to concur with the conclusion on the detriments of the past. Here I’d refer to the negative pasts. They could be those that would scar you deeply. They could also be sorrowful yet full of meaning.

During the earlier phase of my adolescence, I used to dwell into sadness quite often. It really showed not only on my face but especially in the eyes. Till one day, my great mentor shook me up and told me that our brain is not meant for storing rubbish. Just put them in a box and throw it away. Forever.

Alhamdulillah, I was 17 then and it wasn’t too late for anything too change in this world. I’ve learnt to accept and forget ever since. By leaving the past I was able to savour the good things that came to me with the feeling of Syukur. One simple word but undeniably theultimate key of contentment in life.

I am gratefully thankful to Allah for unendingly sending angels in disguise to teach me and support me till today. Knowing or not whether they are those angels, I thank them too and I shall have them in my prayers always, God Willing. Ameen..

Mental Academe Suppression

B

urger King, Sri Property Mas – It has been a delicate situation for me for the past few weeks. There were moments when my mind was inundated with ideas but all I could do was to keep mum. Silence is the best policy. Why? Why? Why?

The environment disallows me from doing so. I am in a dilemma of what to say and what not. I fear of blurting the triggers of sensitivity. On one side, I wished to share with the rest what I thought and to have a dialogue of minds. On the other part, I didn’t want them to nurture any sense of prejudice towards me. My principle is that; I come for peace. I guess I adhere to what Rafsanjani had proposed in the UN. That doesn’t mean I’m a Shi’ite though.

Being brought up in a multiracial environment, I’ve never felt any discrimination towards others. From where I came from, people were cooperative and respected their different traditions. Well at least in the society where I was brought up with. The Malays, Javanese, Arabs, Chinese and Indians were friendly to each other. Glitches were minimal of course.

So here I am, still adjusting the blueprint of my jurisdiction. It is disheartening to see the outcome of colonialism today. The divide and rule system has subtly left us with cracks within the nation. I really hope it will never break up like it did in 1969. God Forbid!